 Conflict, hm. What do you do when faced with a potential conflict? Do you avoid it or do you have defensive default? Fight or flight? Either way, faced with a challenging situation, there is not always going to be a positive solution. Why is it that the biggest cause of #YouthHomelessness is still parental eviction? What is the connection I wonder? Conflict can be really challenging to both parents and young people; it challenges us all at times. Conflict is a part of life; handling conflict well is a skill and like any other skill, it improves with practice. Next time your challenging teenager gets in a strop about something, stop and ask yourself how you could handle this situation to get a win win resolution. Sometimes, a little negotiation goes a long way. If you are a young person reading this, the same applies to you; be prepared to be flexible; life is about give and take and is much too short to live in a state of perpetual conflict. The trouble is, you think you have time. Buddha  If you are struggling with family relationships, feeling that the only way to resolve the situation is to leave, to move the young person out, please try us first. At BYHP, we offer a professional family mediation practice and we may be able to help. It is worth a try; contact us through the referral form on our website or give us a call, we are here to help.
Tel: 01295 259 442 Email: mediation@byhp.org.uk Referral Form: www.byhp.org.uk/services-referral-form
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 Photo by Jordan McQueen It seems that youth work, at times, does not get the credit that it so very much deserves. Often frowned upon, youth work can be seen as nothing more than a worker playing pool with young people and the question can often arise “what is its purpose?” Youth work is so much more than that, and like a complex puzzle has many vital pieces that help build its true picture. But it is the youth workers themselves from which youth work really comes to life. The facts are that if people struggle to understand the ever building issues that young people continue to face within contemporary society, then of course youth work will be viewed as nothing more than a worker playing pool with young people. But if people are instead able to step back and seriously consider the various struggles that young people face when trying to conform to the way in which society expects them to, then they can begin to see youth work in its truest form and begin to understand just how incredibly important a role it plays. The truth is that many young people find it very difficult when riding the rapids of mainstream influence which can often lead to a sea of issues. Once contrived, these issues can run deep often causing financial instability, mental health problems, drug and alcohol issues and at worst homelessness. And all of which lead to social exclusion.
 Hi, hope you are all having a good week after the Bank Holiday weekend. Just wanted to share something with you - we support between 200 to 300 young people and their families a year and we do that on between £200k and £300k income per year (both numbers vary based on which year but it is pretty consistent). That means our service costs a little less than £1000 for every young person we support. We help them remain in a safe home family situation; We help them work through various problems with 1:1 support and counselling; We help them navigate through the complexities of housing registers, benefits systems and tenancy agreements; We give them confidence and hope to move forward in their working lives and... We provide a surrogate family home to those who don't have one. £1000 to change a young life - not much is it? Please keep spreading the word about BYHP - your support is priceless to us but we need funds urgently to continue our work. BYHP - Hope....not just homelessness Please help BYHP by texting BYHP01 £1, £2, £3, £4, £5 or £10 to 70070 or by visiting https://localgiving.com/charity/byhp Thank you (Photo: Four Shires Magazine)  I remember when I first had contact with BYHP. My occupational therapist from the community mental health team had phoned BYHP and asked them to make contact with me. I was too anxious to answer the phone and even more anxious to return their call. I eventually managed to make contact with them and was offered counselling. At the time anorexia, depression and avoidant personality disorder were crushing me, I felt like the ant being squashed under someone’s shoe. I was far from okay, I hardly wanted to be alive.
I missed my first counselling session. I had got up and dressed and walked to the bus stop in plenty of time but I was too anxious to put my hand out and stop the bus and it drove past me. I walked back home and cried into my pillow. The next counselling session I managed to get the bus but got totally lost on the way to BYHP. I was crying and about to turn back home when Deb, my counsellor at BYHP, offered to meet me and walk me to the building. I went into treatment and had to stop going to BYHP but nearly a year later I was in a worse place. I had made a very serious attempt on my life and had rarely left the house since my discharge from the psychiatric ward. I was in a horrible place. I would cry so loudly at night that it would wake my family up. Deb began to visit me at home and I would be so anxious I could hardly speak to her. I remember having all this stuff flying around my head but the words wouldn’t form into sentences and I’d get so frustrated and angry with myself. I began to email Deb. As a child I loved writing, I would spend my summer holidays writing stories but my illness took that enjoyment away. My illness stole everything and I forgot who I really was. Emailing Deb gave me a release, it enabled me to tell someone in this world what was actually going on, it became my form of communication but Deb also picked up on my talent for writing. Slowly I began to leave the house. It was difficult, I couldn’t get the guts to ring the doorbell at BYHP and there were times where I would stand outside freezing cold with the rain pouring down wishing for someone to walk past the door and spot me. I attended the peer support group and it felt like a novelty to be outside of the four walls of my home. I did the unlocking potential programme as well as art and music sessions. BYHP didn’t make me feel like a poorly young woman nor a sad story, BYHP became my family and empowered me through noticing my talents and boosting my confidence and self-esteem. My family moved away to Wales and I was deeply upset to leave BYHP but BYHP is a family and you can never truly leave. BYHP will always be a huge part of my life because they really did help me turn my life around. I have never met such lovely, caring individuals. There is no place like BYHP. My life now is so incredibly different to how it was two years ago. I regularly appear on TV and radio as well as in magazines and newspapers. I run a successful blog and write for The Huffington Post. I visited BYHP the other day and walked to the door with a huge smile on my face and pressed that doorbell without hesitation. Without BYHP I would probably still be stuck within the four walls of my home but because of their love, kindness and helping hand I have gone the opposite way and flown into the spotlight in order to make a difference to the lives of those with mental health problems. Thank you BYHP for all you have done. |
BYHP BlogOur blog is a great way to stay up to date with current events and projects, stories from our young people and the general goings on at BYHP. Archives
January 2021
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